Pondering

Pondering

35 weeks

That’s how long I have been pregnant. I have been loving every step of the way. That is not to say I had no discomforts, or pains, or worries. I had all that. Currently I am dealing with reflux and heartburn.

These feelings and sensations and physical responses, however, are so minimal when compared to the wonder of developing a little boy inside of me; a little boy that is the combination of my husband and I; a little boy that makes me laugh or smile with every move, and makes me tear up to the thought of holding him in my arms.

Goodbye, Hello

I am a month away from taking my leave from work. It took forever, but I have finally found a substitute who will continue teaching the kids that became part of my life this year. As hard as it is to leave them, I am looking forward to the 25th of April, when I will say goodbye to them so I can say hello to my little baby boy.

The kids ask me if I will bring my baby to meet them, and as much as I want to say “Yes” to make them happy, I feel I will not want to leave the house so soon. Right now all I want to do is cuddle with my belly and my husband and not even think whether there is a world outside or not.

Life between Spring Break and the new school year

We have been doing exactly that during this Spring Break, and the thought of going back on Monday for another month irritates me, especially knowing I will be leaving so soon. Where do I get the energy to teach one month?

My other concern refers to the fact that school starts over again in August, and my baby will be only 3 months old. Who on Earth is ready to leave their baby at such young age? The pain hits my chest like a dagger when I think about it.

Carpe my diem

To get over that first hill, the best idea seems to be using my Summer School experience and plan a one-month course; a focused, intensive month, with a beginning and an end in mind, and the advantage of knowing the students beforehand.

As for the second issue, I have come to think that the best approach is denial, or splitting. The way to not stress about the parting, I think, is to not think about it until it happens. Or at least until August happens. Like I have mentioned before, over the three years I have worked in this district, I have had three different assignments. Who knows what awaits me in 2013/2014? Maybe I should carpe my diem until the time comes to confront reality again.

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